No one person could possibly do what I did these past two weeks. I literally wished there was two or three of me, and that the day would have like 50 hours instead of 24. At one point I wished stores could stay open later, in order for me to get everything I needed...so weird. The past two weeks were a blur of birthdays, family, friends, classes, errands, meetings, homework, tests, and a little alone time. It wasn't possible for one person to do it all, so I didn't. haha. Really though, it wasn't just me, I had God pulling me through the whole way, giving me energy and rest when I needed it most. My friends came into town so I stayed up super late each night catching up with them. Little sleep was inevitable. I had to make choices all the time to use my time wisely, which was even more difficult for me because I'm already indecisive...so I wasted time thinking about what to do next. Perfect. Despite all the obligations, I praise God for the time I spent in Spokane, Washington.
Kristin and I fought going there so hard (for certain reasons) but God wanted us there. I still don't really know why, maybe won't for a long time, maybe never. Maybe it was to see my mom, sister,& brother, to be with the Williams' family during a hard time in their life, to spend more quality time with Ted & Diane, to have alone time for the first time in 6 weeks....I just don't really know. I mean, I learned a lot in the 6 days of classes that I attended, but I could've learned that back here in Costa Rica??? Maybe it was to refresh my perspective on Costa Rica and America....and their differences. Oh well, It's wasting time and energy now to think about it. I mean I want to reflect, but I don't want to try to come up with an answer that is just unnecessary to come up with.
In reflection though, I think I realize how much I truly need to be surrounded by friends and family--to be in a community of believers. They are so important to me, and I value their support, encouragement, opinions, criticisms, and love. It's just, I am someone who easily lets that slip by. I don't ask for help very often, and when I do it's because I really need it. These past two weeks I needed a lot of help and a lot of questions answered, and the fact that so many people were willing and were brought joy in the act of serving/helping me really convicted me. I don't want to inhibit the space for God's love to be shown, at all. Besides, he'll work where he wants to work with or without me, haha. But who am I to decide who gets to serve who and when and why? I play a small part in all this, but my part is significant. I can allow others to encounter Christ. Lately I've been really meditating on the truth that I am forgiven...for past sins, present sins, and future sins. I am forgiven, and so is everyone else who is called God's child. Who am I to judge? I am here to love and forgive as I have been forgiven. I get to serve others and be served for Christ's glory. It's all so powerful. I am encouraged by the power of forgiveness, fresh starts, and second chances. I am encouraged daily by God's new mercies. Thank God I am able to be back in Costa Rica for another 3 months teaching, learning, loving, and experiencing life down here!
-Allie
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